How not to be a dick at an art fair.

There's only one step. It's not that hard.

So, you're downtown in the blazing sun with hundreds of people around you, walking slowly through an arts and crafts fair. People are bumping into you. You've been there. The food trucks are at the other end of the promenade, emitting smells of gyros and pretzels with salt the size of diamonds. Firefighters hand out neon pencils to the children who are in awe of them (the firefighters and the pencils). Kids race-walk to the cotton candy vendor. People with questionable sartorial decision-making abilities are making fun of some of the art on display. There are music sounds in the background as a band warms up.

There are likely white tents above the wares of artisans who are hoping to catch your eye as you do this particular slow march of humanity past them. You try to see what's for sale with a quick glance without looking at the seller, so you don't feel compelled to stop and chat. You know you do this. These are people who got up at the crack of dawn that morning to be part of the fair; whether you like their art or it's just not to your taste, at least offer a hello. They have made things and are offering them to the world. That is a Strong Offer. And that is hard to do.

Something does catch your eye. It is beautiful, and you would like to have it in your very home to admire daily. You love what it moves in you. You want to touch it and wake up to it in your house. Or it is the perfect gift for Aunt Agnes' 80th birthday next month.

Here is one sure-fire way to not be a dick about purchasing it:

Never utter the words, "Would you take less for it?"

You love it, you want it, and the human being in front of you has actually MADE IT WITH THEIR OWN HANDS, using their creative spark to do so. That takes talent, skill, learning, and time spent perfecting their art over a lifetime, not to mention the artistic genius of a caliber that has moved your heartstrings to the point of desire.

Now is not the time to low-ball. Do that at the grocery store and see where it gets you: "Hey, would you take less for these eggs?" Or, "I'll give you $2.00 for that 20-pound tub of cat litter." Or how about at Home Depot? "Hey, can I have that electric saw for free? I'll make good use of it." Or at the car dealership? In fact, do it there. See what happens. Get it all out of your system there.

Only negotiate price (not value) with big companies, not individual artisans or small businesses whose margins are tiny. I don't understand this behavior. We don't negotiate at the Piggly Wiggly, but it becomes a national pastime when dealing with artists and individuals who are trying to make their way in the world by writing or making music or some other creative act. It is unseemly, and you don't want to be unseemly, do you? (Plus, most of the time, we should be paying more than what an artist is asking.)

So, no, don't do this haggling. Pay the price the artist has assigned it. They know much better than you what it took to create the thing you love\u2014and it didn't just take the time it took to paint it. It took a lifetime of knowing. And they, too, need to make a living\u2014and artists deserve to make a fine living for all they bring to the world. And you need to value that with the money you made with your own little hands.

A lot of people own small businesses. And we get asked all the time for discounts or freebies. And many people are artists and musicians and creative sparks who try to make their living making their art. AND ISN'T THAT FANTASTIC!

You know what isn't fantastic? When you ask for that better deal. Do pay what the artist has suggested is fair for their time and expertise. And always be grateful that there are people in the world making art.

Other things that are not fantastic:

1) Asking writers and artists and other small business owners why their stuff costs so much or why they can't give you a free whatever. That is far from fantastic. Please. Go ask for a free car, instead. They can afford to give you one; we can't.

2) Seeing art made by someone, telling them you could make that yourself, and then making it yourself rather than buying it from the person who actually had the idea in the first place. Not cool. Support artists in the way you would like to be supported if you were sitting in the sun all day at a craft fair with your heart splayed out on the tables in front of you.

3) We all love a deal. I know that. Ask big box stores for deals, not individuals. Also, when you buy a book for a big discount, no author is getting anything from that sale. We barely get anything when you buy it for full price.

4) If you commit to purchasing something that involves the payment of money, follow through on your commitments. This is particularly true if the artist has provided a payment plan to make it easier for you.

I always hire poets, writers, artists, and musicians for my Life is a Verb Camp. Camp doesn't turn a profit and I'm not made of money (what an understatement!), but here is my statement about hiring artists for Camp:

I have always hired poets as our keynote speakers because I believe that poets deserve and need our support. I don't ask their fee because most would lowball themselves, but rather, I offer my generous fee to them. If it is not enough, I understand that, but I don't want to pay less than that to anyone, regardless of whether they would have asked for less.

We have got to support people who are making our world more beautiful and more meaningful with their work.

Carry on and buy art.

Love,
Patti

P.S. Don't even tell me you've ever said, "I could do that" at an art fair. The point is, you didn't do it. They did. Go put your hypothetical art on your wall if you must, but hush up. [Disclaimer: This whole post might have been written by Cranky Patti.]

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